A FEW SHADES OF PASTEL

 I have decided to give up today .            I am leaving it on universe . The universe has its own plans .Let me explain.           If I don't like doing something , I simply won't do that .So that thing won't come to me .If I like doing something , I will hold onto it , no matter how difficult it is. If I grow a new passion , if I find new love in some other things , I will change my plan like course of a river .           By giving up I don't mean giving up on my dreams . It's just that I have accepted I have fascinations for different things and I will pursue those according to my own free will . I have accepted that I can't plan everything beforehand . I just will do things that I like doing and my life will go on like this .            Maybe that's what I am gifted with - the ability to give up on plans ,trusting the process and not putting myself in a box .  Im...

 More I  am growing up ,more I am unlearning things .  My parents are a bit prejudiced .They are far better than other people and still ,I would say they are prejudiced . I am better at many things than my parents . I am open to new ideas ,I read , I learn .My parents do that too .But what makes me better is ,I am willing to accept new things .   It becomes really difficult to live the life we want to live , the things we want to do , to make choices independently by going against the will of our parents . Parents bring us up with their own ideals ,with their own vision and then they try to impose those on us and on Ready to take-off ? society as well (that's why others' parents judge us ).They really want our good , but don't know we actually suffer because of their sense of "good"😂.  Trust me ,apart from  screaming to have our vegetables and those reprimands for getting addicted to smartphones ,most of the times they are wrong. We are taught to list...

 I come across some rare things in our society which make me happy . 1. People offering their seats to women and senior citizens in public transport. I do that and once upon a time a man offered me his seat in a crowded bus as I was struggling to balance myself. 2.Unknown guys on internet who dm me only for pure friendship /study advice (which happened just today and i met few before,too ).These things are very rare and my frowns disappear out of surprise. I respect them , really. 3. People standing in disciplined way in a queue without any jostling or pushing .That happens once or twice in lifetime in India. 4. Unconditional Friendship - having nice  ,sweet and caring friends apart from best friend : I have those kind of friends in college with whom I don't share heart-to - heart conversations maybe ,but they are really kind people. 5.Non-judgemental people- Fortunately , I have some people like this in my life . 6. Parents telling their child to follow their heart- Next Jan...

 Things have changed a lot in the past few days. I am losing people and at the same time I am gaining people and their love. I am crying less and I am smiling more. I am having stupid Harry Potter dreams in nights instead of nightmares. Isn't that a good sign? I am becoming comfortable in my own skin. I am focusing on my dreams . I am becoming a more organized person . For some strange reasons , failed attempts are not demotivating me . I am not thinking of giving up . It's like I am writing my own destiny and nothing can stop me from that .I am worrying less and living more. I have learnt the subtle art of nurturing friendship - people who add value to my life and people who don't add value to my life. I am gaining control over my time. I am becoming selfish about my time.                             Shady things are getting pastel and the clouds are getting clearer. I can see the sunrays amidst the haze.

image source :Pinterest    31st  May .2022 I had already created a mental draft "nobody will wish me on my birthday" and that I did not make in a bitter note . I thought like that because I am observing that for past few years . I was the one to remember everyone's birthday and it was just not  like that in my case . Obviously I am referring to my friend circle , not my family. I am lucky to have a caring family (on my maternal side ). I trained my emotions that nobody told me to remember their birthdays ,so they actually are not bound to bear the burden of my expectations.Also , a friend whom I thought to be the best one , who actually wrote hearty wishes for me on her status ,actually turned out to be a very toxic one. I realized the trouble of inviting temporary personalities into life. I grew cautious , wary of friendship and obviously birthday wishes.  Just because people don't remember my birthday don't mean they are mean ,right? Everybody is going through...